Making Progress

2013 is coming to a close and like many others I'm reflecting.  My family circle, though bruised, singed, punctured, bumped, tossed, expanded and twisted, has not been broken. And I'm thoroughly thankful.

My year didn't start out well and there were so many ups and downs. I've lost money, clothing, jobs, love, pictures, data, hair, even weight -- but I'm still here.  There must be a reason for that. 

All in all, I haven't lost my smile, my passion, or sight of my goals. I'm looking forward to 2014 and all it has to hold. 

May the best of the old year be the worst of the new. 

Gardening with Grandma

A teenage granddaughter comes downstairs for her date with this see-through blouse on and no bra. Her grandmother just pitched a fit, telling her not to dare go out like that! The teenager tells her "Loosen up Grams. These are modern times. You gotta let your rose buds show!"  And out she goes. The next day the teenager comes down stairs, and the grandmother is sitting there with no top on. The teenager wants to die. She explains to her grandmother that she has friends coming over and that it is just not appropriate. The grandmother says, "Loosen up, Sweetie. If you can show off your rose buds, then I can display my hanging baskets." Happy Gardening!

Privacy RIP

Folks consistently complain about not having privacy due to social media.  But what they don't realize or won't accept is the simple fact that no one will know what you don't tell.  Let that marinate for a moment.

It seems that we've become so accustomed to posting every tidbit online -- checking in at restaurants, events and other venues, sharing pics of us with friends or our meals, our opinion about a movie or show, and so on and so on -- that we've actually decided that when someone disagrees they are being negative.  Um...no. They are actually just disagreeing.  It's gotten so bad that folks request as they post "no negative comments."  Guess what...you can't control what people say.  Well, that's not all the way true.  You can always delete comments that you don't like.  But you can't otherwise control how people will respond to what you've posted, even with your request.  It's laughable to even think so. And even if we can control what's posted on our page, what is being said behind our backs on other pages, in groups and posts elsewhere, in emails and text messages?  Way too much to worry about. We may say that what others think about me isn't my business but if we really feel that way we wouldn't care about negative comments.  Such a conundrum.

Instead of attempting to censor those who may respond, why don't we censor ourselves?  No reason to post something that may elicit negative responses in the first place.  It's obvious that nothing is private any more.  Screenshots are a great example of what can never be sent.  Information posted on other sites can be copied and pasted and shared with others too.  So the only way to totally ensure privacy, and the absence of responses that hurt our feelings, is to not tell our business.

Now I for one enjoy posting via social media.  But I do understand that some things can't be shared.  I daresay we should all take a breather prior to hitting send.  Think twice, three times even.  Then and only then, if you really and truly aren't concerned with the backlash, say it with your chest!  Just realize that I may see it somewhere and I will have something to say and you may just find it to be negative.  Ah well...the pen never rests!

FB Chain Posts

Like if you agree.

Share this post if you agree.

Why are you telling me what to do on my Facebook page via a post on yours?

The entire purpose of MY Facebook page is to post what I want to post.  

I may like or share your sentiments, but I may not wish to share them at this time and in this manner.  And further, I certainly may not wish to share them with the demand that others do the same. This idea stretches to blacking out or posting certain pics on certain days.  Nope, I don’t think I want to do that.  Does it mean I don’t support the flavor of the cause of the day? … not really.  

Social media is one avenue of support and I wish to use other, more effective ways to make changes in my society.  Now you may argue that social media has been very influential in alerting the world of certain situations that may have otherwise been swept under the carpet and I would agree with you.  However, awareness does not necessarily equal change.  (Think: smoking.)  I wish to do the latter.  I write to share information and raise awareness.  Money effects change.  Sad but true.  When I truly wish to make a change, I raise money and become a part of a reputable organization that forces change in the area of my choosing.  Liking a Facebook post won’t do that, no matter the number of likes. 

It’s ironic how our society has latched on to the “bully syndrome” – most likely by less-thans who were taunted throughout their childhoods – but we don’t seem to make the correlation with these posts.   Intimidation is, in fact, bullying when tactics such as guilt – if you want the little girl to die, keep scrolling – are employed.  Why do we condone this?  We've proven that we’re too thin-skinned to stand up to any other forceful techniques but consistently cry about being bullied.  I often maintain that the only way to stop a bully is by building your self-esteem.  You have to be so confident in who you are and why you are doing what you’re doing that nothing another person says or does can sway you.

For that reason alone, I often keep scrolling.

NaNoWriMo

National Novel Writing Month begins today.  And it couldn't have come at a better time.  I've been slacking on my writing and needed a push.  So here goes...

I Have A Dream...Too

On this 50th commemoration of the March on Washington, I realize that I, too, have a dream.  It is deeply rooted in the American dream as well as the Black community's dream and my parents' dreams.  And I'm taking this moment to reflect on my progress toward it.  What have I done, what am I doing, when will I achieve it?  I'm always enamored by the opening line of Langston Hughes' poem, A Dream Deferred -- "What happens to a dream deferred?"  Mine is sagging like a heavy load right now.

I'm often dissident when references are made to Dr. King's historic speech because we all too often harp on the color factor and play the race card -- the very opposite of what his wishes were.  I even cringe when I hear references to the "First Black President" and see t-shirts with Obama and King shaking hands.  It saddens me to see the efforts of the movement misconstrued in such ways.  Yet, there is a dream.

After reading an article about Asa Philip Randolph, I've found perspective.  I've always wanted to honor those unknown and forgotten members of the Civil Rights movement, even those who didn't support it.  We each have a role to play in life and no matter who gets the glory, we all progress.  My father was one of the thousands at the original march in 1963 (years before I was born) and I smile every time I think about it.  To know that he participated makes me stand taller and walk more confidently.  It's also humbling to know that he wasn't mauled by dogs or ripped in parts by water hoses or beaten by spectators or lynched or missing and I'm here by divine design.  What choice do I have but to shake my dream off and walk around with it on my shoulders?!  It's no longer deferred, it's not dried up or festering or stinking.  It's exploding!

Thank you to all who helped to make it happen!

Employment Agency Conundrum

It may not be the best decision to speak out about this, as a backlash from the employment community may ensue.  However, I believe "our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter" as stated by Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.  I recently found that I was "ineligible for rehire" by Keepers Staffing Agency.  Is that even legal?  A staffing agency!!!  I've never skipped on assignment, why would they not want to rehire me?  Instead of creating feelings of self-doubt or insecurities about my skills and abilities, this news stirred an uprising in my pen.  Time out for being nice -- they are neither the only agency in town nor the only ones playing the "you didn't let ME find you a job so I'm going to make this hard for you" card.  I'm not sure what can be done to curb this type of activity, especially since the majority of leads found on sites like Indeed, SimplyHired, and Monster are agencies.  Hopefully, exposure is step one.

If it looks too good to be true, then it probably is.

I've heard this repeatedly, even found it to be true and it hurts every time I relive it.  The most recent lesson was taught by Keepers, a staffing agency.  Most agencies offer to find jobs, usually at no fee to me.  Of course, the companies I've worked with are charged a finder's fee, so to speak and if I'm hired full-time as an employee, they pay a hefty fee to the agency.  Sadly, things have changed significantly over the years since companies want to weed through resumes, taking placement a little longer.  It's rather ridiculous for short term temporary assignments but an unavoidable measure.  Keepers is one agency, rather local, that requires exclusivity.  According to the contract, you aren't allowed to work with other agencies or work anywhere else for that matter.  They guarantee, yes guarantee, to keep you working 30 hours per week while they find you a permanent job.  Sounds too good to be true, right?  I signed up.

November 2006.  Unfortunately, I'd already registered with other agencies and other, more lucrative opportunities were presented.  I terminated my employment with Keepers to pursue these avenues. On a recent job search (2013), I reached out to all of my contacts for job leads, then re-activated my registrations with agencies. Now, a few have neglected to respond to emails and voicemail messages and I'm hoping it's because they don't have anything that fits my skillset.  This situation was quite different.  I'm not the only one who's experienced this as I've found reviews about the company that read similarly.  I'm just finding it hard to understand why the attainment of a permanent job (poor choice in terms for today's employment culture) is not applauded. 

Even though I've realized that agencies are optimal for entry level workers and those who don't wish to work full time for whatever reason, I still register.  But for those of us who require a salary, benefits, vacation time, some semblance of stability and maybe, just maybe, a permanent job, agencies are just not the answer.  Though posting this has been a hard decision, "injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere."  

Helpful links:
http://www.keepersonline.net/home.htm http://business.reachlocal.com/search/career-employment/recruiters-agencies/DC/Washington/Keepers/283bb0e/ http://www.jobitorial.com/keepers-inc--job-reviews-C4973 http://www.manta.com/c/mtw1f3x/keepers